perched on my rooftop observation deck
as ambulances careened you
life sprawled out broken neck
tourists flash carefree away
fuck your royalties
replay in my head
last words to me you said
naked as down my hall
you flailing arms about
this was the last time
no more again it's the last
five minutes before
this dance i know the routine
fine difference is tragedy unfolding
in my mind escape from this sickness
i've willed myself watching you die
but you're in front of me
standing naked and your face
is red turning as on and on you go
but i'm eight again drunk in
a safe fantasy space
can you see me from my window
looking on you you slide you go
ambulance driver looks up at me
smiling on you can you see me
eye you like terrorists w/o a motive
i watch as you explode and i can stand motionless
frozen with apathy you're still in front of me
fireworks blinding your face mouth still moving
and i'm paralyzed with what you want from me
as you're taken away but our proximity
is still that we share the same breath in this hallway
i could reach out and grab you by your voice
but i stand can't believe that this re-run
goes on and i scream on inside is it for you you die
but you're breathing your breath
is a mist from your chest to my face as
i'm stillborn in front of you
i'm torn between guilt and rage
eye you like terrorists as you blow
The End